The
Monster
Clawed
into a wooden wall tallies engraved in blood dripped into the infested and
mouldy water. A merge of vomit and urine flowed past me as constant
pitter-patters filled the eerie landscape. An intricate door handle stood
before me smothered in crimson blood. What sinister figure lurked before me? I
could nearly envisage the blood-curdling creature pierced with stab wounds and
malicious glares.
I
could almost feel the perilous breath gazing over me, taunting me again and
again. I could smell fungified rodents crawling over its satanous body. These
hallucinations will haunt me forever. My heart cannot take this any longer, I
could feel death any minute.
It
gives me shivers to have the feeling that devious eyes are fixated on me. How
will I survive this dreadful havoc? If only I wasn’t so stupid to have listened
to my friends.
Well Done Hana! You used good vocabulary such as perilous and intricate. To make it better, you could describe the monster in more detail.
ReplyDeleteI like your vivid descriptions and the rhetorical question.
ReplyDeleteTry to keep the tense consistent and make sure that it makes sense.
great work Hana the vocabulary was marvellous,and you were great with the setting description. you could describe the monster more to make it that much better
ReplyDeleteI like your discriptive language like perilous,havoc and devious eyes
ReplyDeleteTo improve,at the end discribe the monster more